2 posts tagged “habits”

There's a bug (or two) going around Seattle.  A colleague told me about a sinus-oriented virus that most of our video crew got a few weeks ago.  So if I'm getting sick I'm not surprised.  I just can't tell if I'm getting sick, or what.

All week I have felt sub-par. It's more difficult than usual to wake up and lots of caffeine is required to stay alert.  Even with coffee I've been feeling groggy and lethargic.  I've been watching a lot of Lost episodes in the evenings because I don't have the energy for much else.  Even reading seems like too much effort.

I don't tolerate heat well, and this has been a hot week.  On Wednesday it was up to nearly 100F - so for most of the week I assumed this lethargy was heat-related.  On Friday it had cooled down, and yet I felt even worse. 

I still feel just plain ech.  No cold symptoms have developed (except for incredible sinus pressure that makes my eyes water...), but I still feel like I'm hovering at the edge of something flu-like.  My muscles and joints ache, my thinking is cloudy, and I am so tired.

Or... maybe this is one of those hard-to-diagnose maladies like Chronic Fatigue or Adrenal Fatigue.  My naturopath tentatively diagnosed me with adrenal fatigue a couple of years ago.  Tentatively because in order to test for it properly cortisol levels in the blood have to be checked every four hours and insurance doesn't cover this kind of testing.  I have hypothyroidism and this often goes along with adrenal fatigue.  Adrenal fatigue is caused by long-term stress.  When the adrenal glands are reacting to stressful situations on a daily basis the natural hormonal response begins to do damage to the body's systems by causing a domino effect of hormonal imbalances.

I have been under a lot of stress lately.  I am good at remaining level-headed in stressful situations, which is why I do well at my job (dealing with deadlines and encroaching entropy), but the stress still has the physical impact - perhaps more so because I internalize rather than publicly freaking out.

There are some supplements that can help balance the adrenals, but the key is diminishing or better coping with stress.  Exercise, breathing, healthy food, and social support all do wonders for stress.  I know what I need to do, but I feel too worn out to resist urges for simple carbohydrates and the desire to lie on my couch doing something totally passive.  These responses only make it worse.  Drinking made it worse, too.  So now I am trying to do things that will make it better.

It's not easy to change habits, and I have a lot of them to change.  I'm starting with getting up early because that will give me the time to exercise more often, and exercise will give me more energy.  I have been having a very hard time with this first simple change, but I blame the heat.  In the winter I will blame the cold, and the darkness.  It's always something.

The next habit will be cooking dinner and cleaning up after, then putting clothes away before bed, then flossing, etc, etc... I have a list.  It all sounds rather tedious, but having a routine and having a simplified, organized space will greatly reduce my stress level.  In order to get to the part where I move forward with my life I have to first get healthy and that means changing a lot of bad habits into good ones.  If I can only find the energy...

I don't do Spring cleaning like I don't do New Years resolutions.  If one wants to clean behind the fridge or quit smoking, do it on October 4!  Why not!

Due to a lack of coordinated effort toward heavy cleaning and a general disinclination to clean at all... I haven't really had a good housecleaning... Um, I'm not sure when actually.  I clean up when I move.  I clean some areas on occasion and then proceed to mess them up again in short order.

On January 1 I quit drinking alcohol.  This could be looked on as a resolution of sorts, but it's really more of a major lifestyle change.  So why not try Spring Cleaning this year too?  Another major lifestyle change perhaps.  I've made a list and plan to start as soon as I finish writing my final essay for my undergraduate career at the UW on Saturday.  I plan to finish the Spring cleaning list as well as a weeklong detox sometime before I go to the hot springs on the 27th.  I am generally a lazy and weak-willed person, but when I decide to do something I DO IT. We'll see if I come back moaning and making excuses at the end of April.

I have been thinking quite hard about my lifestyle and my values lately and the ways they don't exactly sync up in many ways.  I am taking a hard line with my finances and coming to terms with just how much I have over-spent on nothing. I don't regret any of my travels, although they were not necessarily fiscally wise, but I do regret how I have learned to spend to try to make myself feel better.  Very few of the shoes and clothes and cds and nights out have turned out to be worth the price, especially the price I end up paying for carrying a balance on my credit cards.

I am going to make a difficult and humiliating admission.  My credit card debt is nearly $30K and I honestly can't think of more than a couple of things I have to show for it.  A nice bed... Yeah, that's about it.  I was about to launch into my usual rationalization but why bother.  There's nothing wrong with me that isn't wrong with many others.  We get sucked into the lifestyle that costs just slightly more than what we make.  My checking account is currently overdrawn and I am making about twice as much as I ever have before.  I always spend just slightly more than I make. So, another major lifestyle change.  I'm going to start acting like I only make half as much as I do and get out of debt.  It means no lifestyle upgrades or  world travel.  It means cooking  for myself and bringing my lunch.  It means skimping on Christmas gifts and wearing the same clothes for another year.  It means simplifying.

It's hard to give up bad habits, but somebody's gotta do it.