Is it worth the trouble?

Mar 26, 2008 at 6:08 PM
10 comments

I am now close to 20K words on the childhood memoir I have been plugging away at for the last six months or so. I want to keep going, to finish, but I am struggling with why I want to do this. What is the backbone of the narrative? It's not really about me, it's about growing up ("coming of age" if you must) at a specific place and time, surrounded by eccentric characters and a schizophrenic mother. If it's about anything, it's about the experience of living with mental illness. For me, this is just a somewhat disturbing, but basically mundane reality. For potential readers it may bring some understanding about mental illness. I believe that our culture ostracizes the mentally ill to a detrimental degree. People often see psychotic behavior as the fault of the mentally ill person, and not merely a symptom that can and should be treated.

So, would putting my mom out there as the human face of mental illness help to generate understanding? Perhaps it should morph into one of those "semi-autobiographical" works of fiction to depersonalize it a bit and give myself more room to play with the story. On the other hand it may have more power as a recounting of actual events. I'm not sure. Right now, I am trying to put it all down on paper... then I will begin to mold it into its final form. I just hope it does not turn out to be an exercise in self-indulgence. Everyone has stories... is mine really worth elevating to literature? I guess we'll find out.

10 comments

Tags:

memoir,
writing

Comments

A healthy helping of self indulgence is what good non fiction writing is. The toughest part of any writing project is often the why bother, who is going to really care in the end part. Just from the cursory look at your stuff that I've had, it will be worth it. If not for you, for the rest of us.

Agree with Goliard. Literature is one of the few blessings we have in this world. When someone opens up their life so that the rest of us can grow from their experience. Most of what I read is usually someone else's account of how they overcame a unique experience that I might never have even considered possible. It makes me a more caring, aware person and friend, because I can draw on the emotions and experiences shared by someone else. Yours sounds like a story worth sharing and worth reading. So you have at least one reader out there when it's done :)

why not interweave personal experience with fictional characters and storylines?

i say get it all down and then sort it out! every time i sit down to write i do an inner struggle on whether anyone will care etc, and then i remember that i care and that's why i'm doing it :)

I think it's worth it just for you, and probably for others as well. Personally, I think a true story loses something when it's diluted with fiction. Having said that, if I ever wrote my own, I would dilute it with fiction just because there are some things that I feel like I can't say unless I mix them in with fiction - partly for the people who are still alive who are in my story, and partly because I can't face saying them yet unless I say them as being part of a fictional character's life, not my own. (Which is probably a good reason for writing it as my own).

[this is good]

Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. - Finding Nemo

I don't know if "pretentious" is the word. I think everybody has an interesting story to tell, even if I've heard it before. My mom tells the same stories over and over all the time. But she tells them so well. That's the challenge, the telling. If you tell it in a pretentious manner, it will sound pretentious.

From what I've read of you so far, I can't imagine it would.

well done. 20,000 is a lot. most people just talk about doing stuff like this, but you're doing it. well done.

I agree with matokie, that it's as much about the process -- the journey -- as it is about the final product. Your point of view is what's interesting, and the poetry will come from the telling. Don't be too critical.

two things: your story is interesting, and you write with grace--so I say for sure for sure please persevere. do you have a writing group at all? any interest? they can be so good and so bad. I've struggled with nonfiction myself-- that slippery slope of self-indulgence and the looming "what's the point" question (leveled at me more than once in workshop ;) ). reading others sometimes quiets these fears and sometimes makes 'em worse-- jo ann beard's the boys of my youth and mary karr's the liars' club, namely.

Yes, I say go on: the real point will only become clear through the process. The subject matter is not as important as your investment in it, and this only you can tell.

Is it worth the trouble?

Comments

Post a comment

About Me

My Links

Neighborhood

Tags

Archives

goodreads